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Apologies, it’s not a sex swing. Unless, of course, she simply failed to boost that particular piece of furnishing to Elle Decor magazine… The glossy purveyor of furniture and home decor nobody but obscenely wealthy celebrities can afford tapped the obscenely wealthy celebrity for their fall issue. Gwyneth was asked what home items she simply can’t live without, and her answers included hand-painted wallpaper, the sacred books of assorted world faiths (all placed at the same level for maximum metaphorical punch, natch), and a bathtub in the bedroom. You heard us. A bathtub in the bedroom. Sounds excessive (thinking about the plumber’s bill alone makes us nauseous), but Gwinnie insists it’s perfect for bathing the kids. Funny- we can think of a few uses for a bathtub in the bedroom, but NONE of them involved kids.

See Gwyneth Paltrow’s sexiest naked scenes in and out of the bath at MrSkin.com!

First, a disclaimer: If any part of this book, including the dedication, was actually typed out by any one of the Kardashian sisters and not described to a ghost writer while getting a pedicure, then I am the Queen of England. Anyway, ghost written or not, the names Kourtney: Khloe: Kim- KARDASHIAN are splayed across the brassy leopard print cover of “Dollhouse,” the sisters’ literary unveiling. Naturally, the book is about the glamorous comings and goings of a “family in the spotlight.” Despite the parallels to their real life (whatever that means for the Kardashians), Kim says it is partly fabricated and “you’ll have to decide for yourself which story lines are true to life, and which ones we dreamed up.”; We suggest you pair it with Snooki’s novel, A Shore Thing, the combination of which will render you functionally illiterate. That’s ok- reading is for ugly people, anyway.

See the Kardashian sisters- Kim, Kourtney and Khloe- nude and sexy on MrSkin.com!

Ben Flajnik may have come in 2nd place on this season of The Bachelorette, but we bet he’s not too torn up about it. The reason? Jennifer Love Hewitt. JLH is a official fan of the show, and the day after the finale she tweeted that Ben had accepted “my final rose.” A few short days later, the reality show rival and the busty Party of Five celebrity were seen canoodling in a San Francisco pub. Who needs first place, anyway- those big, beautiful blossoms JLH has on her chest make for an excellent consolation prize.

See erotic pics of Jennifer Love Hewitt, including her TIT-illating nip slip in The Tuxedo (2002), on MrSkin.com

Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake have had an on-again, off-again state for years, and Timberlake recently hit the “off-again” switch when he declared himself “single” at a Friends with Benefits press event. But Jessica is not one to sit at home and cry into a pint of Ben & Jerry’s, no sir- she’s got a multimillion dollar sci-fi revive to shoot, one that also happens to star a Mr. Colin Farrell. Reports are coming from the set that while Ferrell and Biel haven’t hooked up (at least as far as the little birdies in the crew know), they do have “hot chemistry” and hang out off set, where they are often seen smiling like idiots in each other’s presence. Could Jessica be on her way to permanently giving the former N*Sync-er his permanent N*walking papers so she can take a walk on the Irish side? Only time- and the little birdies in the crew- will tell.

See Jessica Biel give the nude perv-formance of a lifetime in Powder Blue (2000) on MrSkin.com!

Jane Fonda, the swinging ’60s sex symbol who has appeared au naturel in eight movies from 1964′s Joy House to 1989′s Old Gringo, opens up about her effort with body image in the new issue of Harper’s Bazaar magazine. Fonda tells Harper’s that after a decades-long struggles with bulimia (“I wasn’t very happy from, I would say, puberty to 50″, she says), she’s finally felicitous with her body- particularly the rear view: “I’m careful that what I wear will show off my best parts, which are my waist and my butt.” Fonda appears in the magazine in a skin-tight, sheer Stella McCartney gown, showing off the body she’s worked so hard to accept. Jane, if we look anything like you at age 73- hell, if we looked like you now- we’d be nothing but proud.

Find three decades of nudeness from Barbarella herself, Jane Fonda, on MrSkin.com

Look, Ryan Reynolds. You did good when you put a wedding ring on Scarlett Johansson. Everyone knows that that lady is sex on two legs. But you messed up, buddy. You messed up when you divorced her, but we’re here to help you. We imagine you don’t read the paper much, so we’;ll fill you in: according to Us Weekly, the former Mrs. Reynolds is now thinking about getting back together with her ex-hubby. A informant told the gossip rag that Scarlett has been calling Reynolds unendingly, asking how he’s been, wanting to meet up: “She’s doing everything possible to get him to take her back. Even saying she?s ready to have a baby.” Seriously, do you have any idea how good looking your babies would be? Just pick up the telephone, Ryan. You know you want to.

Witness Scarlett Johansson nude at MrSkin.com!